Monday, January 08, 2007

The Spirit

Okay, I need to give an update after last Friday mornings grumblings. I went to the appointment and she was, really a great social worker. I totally expected, in some ways a push to testing for ADD/ADHD or at the very least questioning of homeschooling. But, I was suprised in all that. After giving the SW a quick breakdown of MB's personality & the things that were worrying me, she asked if I had ever read Raising Your Spirited Child. Which I had, back when MB was about three. I had used the suggestions in it, for awhile, but I admit I had gotten lazy and distracted and had not kept up with it as MB matured and her traits had changed.

She did not think that it was ADHD, because even though MB acts like she isn't paying attention, she still absorbs and later will spit back everything verbatim. The fact is, MB is a born multi-tasker. She does do better with several things going on at once. And, she thinks that it is great that I do homeschool her, because I am probably better able to adjust to her needs.

So, it was a good visit. And I came home and pulled back out my copy of the book. It psyched me back up. It reminded me of things I need to do better - look at the positive side of her traits, not how they bug me; wait five seconds & think before I automatically say no; give her the time & opportunity to be with other people or make sure I spend time (not schoolwork) doing things with her; explain to her when & why I need my timeout and some many other things.

Okay, so someone with my introversion this is really difficult and oh, so very draining. I have been exhausted every night this weekend. But, it has really been worth it. We can generally have one good day, but linking them up so that we are actually on our fourth day - Wow! And school today, lovely.

Now that K can play some games I have also recruited her to play games with MB to give me a break once in awhile. It was great watching them play Candyland this weekend - and not having to play it myself. I think those two are getting along better too. And, today, I caught K trying to egg MB into doing something to her, and then she tried to tattle -- hmm little did she know that I was watching from the hallway at the time. So, I am trying to nip that little trick right now. I also told MB how proud I was that she managed to ignore K and not take the bait.

MB also got another little boost this weekend. She scored her first indoor soccer goal of the year. And, I actually got to watch her play on Saturday. The other parents, talk about hearing the right thing at the right time, kept going on about her energy, persistence and total lack of fear. Again, the good side of traits that can frustrate me. It was almost 8:30 pm when we finally got home and I let her call her grandparents and tell them. She was so pleased with herself.

I was dreading today, just a little, since we were going to mix schoolwork into our 'new' relationship. But it went really well. MB started a new co-op class this morning - Hands on Spanish, so she got to get her people fix early today and I got to run errands. When we got home she gave me very little trouble getting down to business. She is finally enjoying and wanting me to do the lunchtime reading. The daily lesson plan checkoff list has been wonderful since I started using it in December.

MB was full of energy today and I had to keep reminding her to stay on task - but we had no meltdowns. She did all of her math by herself and not once did I hear about how 'unfair' her life is. A big check mark for today!!

So, if this keeps on working we will go with it. The SW did give some numbers if we eventually thought we wanted some outside help. But, for right now I am going to keep trying this.




Anonymous said...

Do you know that social workers name? I need help with Tatiana too. Email me if you can tobiwolf at mac dot com. Thanks. Tobi

Dy said...

Yay!! I'm glad to hear it.


A family of six living and learning. You might catch us outside in the mud or working on crafts. We always seem to be on the go, come on and join us.