I've been writing this post in my head for a few days now. Having a had time finding the right words for it, but knowing I need to get it out there.
I've been thinking about expectations, specifically mine regarding Mary for awhile. I'm able to relax so much more with the others regarding their development. But, it seems like I am constantly putting Mary under my own personal microscope. So, this is written to remind myself, AGAIN, to chill.
Somewhere along the way I've gotten it into my head that Mary is 'behind' in her reading skills. I guess it came about because she started off early learning several words by sight, and then just stopped. Her interest in the written word has never been great. Which honestly has been a little heart rendering for me since I am such a reader.
I get myself all worked up about how she is reading and what is she reading and why isn't she interested in reading. That last one I lay squarely on my shoulders. It doesn't help me that I just can't stay away from the wonderful homeschooling blogs and forums and hear all about the chapter books their 7/8-year-olds are reading. I begin to stress and yes, honestly push Mary.
Then, recently, while doing some research for word lists and such I came across a bunch of pages about what second graders should be reading, how second graders are reading. And, the light went off! Mary isn't behind, my expectations are not appropriate for her. And, it isn't the level that my expectations are that are the problem, it's that I even have them and express them.
It is really hard being a homeschool mother when it comes to this area. How much pushing is good, especially for a child that needs that little encouragement to go forward, and how much is detrimental and discouraging. And, when, Oh when do we ever figure this out?
Relax! Breath In...Breath Out!