Rainy Day

I knew when the rain woke me up at 2:30 am this morning I would have to do some plan changing. We had made plans to meet some other kids and parents at the airport observation park for a picnic today - but it rained, and rained and rained some more. No one wanted to do anything else, deciding to spend lazy days at home. Unfortunately, because I limit our out of the house activities the girls were not up for another day at the house.

MB and K suggested their favorite science museum, but I didn't want to drive that far. Instead I suggested an indoor children's activity space. I had not been to it since before K was born and I thought the girls would get a kick out of all the dress-up and pretend activities.

Anyway, we get there - all the way to downtown Raleigh, through highway construction traffic, in the rain, pay our $20.00 entry fee and set out to have fun. It is totally designed as a parent-child interactive. Fine with one or two children who can agree that they want to play grocery store, doctor or whatever. Nearly impossible with three who have three different personalities. EM woul have been happy spending the entire 2 hours at the water sensory table pouring water all over the one set of clothes I had for her. MB thought most of it was babyish, and except for the "hospital" that she could play with the gloves and masks would not do much of anything else. K was the perfect age for the place - and got the most enjoyment out of the totally realistic car and castle. Mommy lasted about an hour-and-a-half before I started wondering if my head would explode from all the toddler squeals echoing around in there.

I should have listened to the girls and taken them to the hands-on science museum. More space, less noice concentrated in one area, and always educational. And, since we have a membership it would have only cost us gas. Live and learn.

As a treat for all of us, we went to McDs. My girls were especially good all day - but I have to say that a couple times in McD's I looked at them wondering why they weren't whining to be allowed to go play before they ate, arguing about their seats, EM wasn't screaming to be out of the highchair. They sat and they ate and we carried on conversations. They finished and asked politely to go play - MB even asking if she could take EM to play. And, she did play with EM styaed with her, helped her down the slides.

Days like this I am noticing are happening more and more frequently. My girls are growing up and they are starting to respond and adapt to some of our changes. I have started to put a lot more trust into the fact that my girls *know* how to act and expect them to act that way. I don't go into so many situations now expecting them or me to melt down- and we all are responding to the new energy around us.

I am not doing a very good job of explaining this. Since MB was about 18 months and we started having some issues with her in public (strong-willed type things) - I decided it would be easier to just be home with her. I would mentally cloth myself with battle fatigues everytime we had to go anywhere. As K and EM have come along - I do try to get out and do some things but try to make wise choices and look for places without many temptations or people. I walk into situations already feeling tense and am ready for whatever meltdown, destructive activity might result from my children being in public. (I know this sounds really bad).

Recently I have been made to realize that I don't trust my children or, especially, myself in how we act in public. I try to control the behavior of the kids so much that they have to push back. I am armed and ready so that the slighest little thing sets me off - I cannot divert or re-direct, instead moving right into battle mommy. Lets say that doesn't make outings very fun. It was me -- Just figuring out to put the responsibility where it belonged, remembering to pray before we go and letting go, relaxing once we are there has made a world of difference recently.

Boy, I got way off topic --

Peace,

Amy